I know I’ve said it before.. calling a inane letter or email the worst ever.. so I won’t proclaim that here.

Then again, this one is certainly a candidate:

Hi, Warren.

GuiltyInc has been talking with your company intermittently about helping address your company’s vague requirements.  I am currently planning a trip to your area in March. Is it possible for us to meet to talk about your vague strategy?

GuiltyInc is the largest vague firm headquartered in Silicon Valley, California. Since we are very familiar with your company’s products and technology, I think we might be able to contribute meaningfully to your vague program.

If you feel it would be better for me to talk with one of your colleagues, I would appreciate your letting me know the name of the appropriate person to contact and forwarding this email.

Thank you for your help and I look forward to your reply.

Sincerely,

GuiltyInc Rep

I’ve changed the company name to GuiltyInc and their vague description of what they do to vague.. not to protect them, just to keep us from discussing that technology. But trust me when I tell you that there is no way that they know anything about my “products and technology” as I don’t have such things!

I imagine that you could look through your standard business letter books and find this letter as a template. The sender likely spent as little time putting in their company name as I did changing it to post here.

Don’t Be a Dull Salesperson When You Talk About Your Book

I’m a firm believer in sending cover letter, introductory emails and any other means of getting you and your book in front of prospects for publicity or sales. Just remember, we all get tons of spam, bad letter and inane requests. It take just a moment to be real and open a dialog with people.

Just use my marketing mantra .. listen and love

1) Find out something unique about your prospects. They have a web site or blog, read it first.

2) Comment to let them know you read up on them.

We all know that people approaching us have business interests and selling desires. We accept that if you have just a modicum of personality. If you can approach the media, book distributors, prospects yourself, do this and you’ll get better results. If you have someone helping you, teach this to them.

Whatever you do, don’t put this off because you think there is more important things to do. You are asking for a human being to allot some of their time to listen to you. They deserve this much attention.

Best of all, the return on investment here is immense. Spending a few extra seconds yourself, or paying your help to add real person al contact will pay off 100x